Balance the Inner Light and the Shadow

“Always think happy thoughts.”

“Positive Vibes Only”

“I want nothing but positive vibes surrounding me”

Sound familiar? I hear this all the time in the New Age spiritual community.

If you’re new to the awakening process, or a seasoned spiritual traveler, you will probably hear this often if not all the time. This is toxic positivity.

Just take a look at it from a grounded point of view first. We are humans first and foremost right now on this planet. That means we do human things and have human emotions and feelings every single day. While feeling positive is one of them, we are not meant to be in that state constantly. It’s unrealistic.

We feel a spectrum of emotions and feelings in a day. To only honor and allow the “feel good” ones is really doing us a disservice to our human experience and personal growth. We shut down an entire side to our being by ignoring the darkness within us. You are not honoring nor accepting yourself as you are if you do not accept all emotions and all parts of yourself fully. This is self betrayal.

By darkness, I mean the parts of ourselves that we find displeasing, and what society deems unacceptable. Our flaws, the parts we dislike, our feelings that hurt such as anger, sadness, or fear. Or what we see in others that we are judging and find unflattering or unacceptable.

Yes, our feelings don’t always feel the greatest but they’re there for a reason. Our emotions are trying to get our attention. There is something that has wounded us, triggered us, overstepped our boundaries, or hurt our feelings, and we need to take care of it. Our emotions are a signal that something needs our attention.

Our energy and emotions naturally ebb and flow. We all have high moments, and low moments, that can vary throughout a day. However high you go, you can equally feel just as low, eventually.

At the beginning of the healing inner journey, your feelings, emotions and vibration, will swing back and forth from extremely high to just as low, like a pendulum, until you create balance and acceptance within yourself. Feel the feeling that is coming up fully. Don’t push it down or mask it or try to ignore it with distractions.

What we really need is balance.

Balance is what we should be striving for not just positivity. Positivity is only one aspect of the whole. Balance within equals balance outside. As above, so below, as within, so without. Balance is where we find stability.

We all have darkness, and we all have light within us. None of it is either “good” or “bad,” it just is. There are no “negative” emotions or just “positive” ones. They are just “emotions.” They are there to alert us to something deeper going on.

Yes, they can affect our vibration. When in a state of low vibration too long our body starts to respond with aliments and diseases. When in a high vibration too long you may crash and burn or develop spiritual ego. But honor the low vibes too. We are always where we need to be in any state.

When your strong emotions appear make some time to sit with them. Be your own friend. Have a chat with yourself. Ask questions. What emotion am I feeling? What is triggering me to feel like this? What memory comes with this emotion? Why does it hurt so bad? Are you feeling vulnerable? Are you scared? This is how you get to the root of your triggers when your emotions become noticeable and you want to react suddenly instead of observe.

Feel into the emotion. Allow them to surface and accept them as a part of you. Embrace yourself. ALL of yourself. There is nothing wrong with you. You’re a human. Be a human. And the more human you are the more your authentic self emerges. And with that the more you live from your soul self in balance.

You don’t need to drown the darkness in light. You don’t need to replace negativity with positivity. You bring the darkness to the light. Like an offering. Fill the darkness with light and love. Integrate it into you. Not shun it away.

Honoring your positive and negative at any given time creates balance. Too much of one side creates imbalance and thus becomes toxic to yourself and others.

“The dark and the light, they exist side by side. Sometimes overlapping, one explaining the other. The darkened path is as illuminated as the lightened…”

Raven Davies